Our Bathtub Poem

Jessica McGee, she/her, co-chair
Water droplets make friends,
 Multiply amongst themselves.
Gather on the tile and puddles at my feet when the story begins.
A water droplet transforms into a stream, 
As I scream
In my head because I don’t want to distract you from your daydream.
How kind of me.
~
 Can I tell you a secret?
I do not know how to organize my thoughts.
When I pay attention to the little whispers in my head,
I lose sense of time,
Sense of self, 
Sense of sense. 
Take a trip with my best friend, 

Dissociation. 
Tear myself apart before I blindly piece my being together. 
~
On second thought,

I do not want to think about it anymore…
Forcing the hinges shut.
Water droplets turning my skin red and adore,
The tingling sensation reminds me of a cigarette butt.
Something to ease the disease that is my mind.
Add it to the bill and tip the waiter.
Another destructive hobby outlined. 
Makes me question my creator.
~
Am I who I thought I would be?
Looking at the boxes of personality

characteristics.
All I see is what I am not. 
Remembering that we are all boiled down to statistics.
I matched my goals and followed my passions.
Lost what was important. 
Strangers pass by without compassion,
Spare a glance and I’m barely a portrait. 
Do I even notice? 
~
Do I even notice…
My daydream does not have the decency to ask for my consideration. 
Reflective rumination.
To be honest, 
It's kind of bogus.
When I pay attention to the little whispers in my head,
I lose myself and get lost till I'm out of focus.
~
I thank the plumbers for their hard work.
Their effort frozen in time.
Meanwhile, I’m stuck with the jerk
That I’m. 
You might think it is silly…
You.